Thoughts from a middle aged mom with “Bigs”

About a year back, I discovered an influencer on Instagram named Esther. 

Esther has meaningful posts about her “BIGS”

 Bigs is referring to her children who have flew the nest…

Her posts resonate with me!

 There is a virtual connection that I feel To Esther, like kindred spirits!

She pulls out of me the same thoughts, joys and concerns that are bouncing around in my heart. 

I love how Esther validates our feelings, longings, and hopes that we have as moms with older kids.

You never stop being a mom! 

When I feel like my kids might be annoyed by my reminders and concerns, blah blah blah

 I remind them, 

“Once a mom always a mom” 

I’m guessing by now some of you are thinking oh dear, what’s going on with Jackie’s kids, Ha ha, 

This spontaneous heartfelt post comes from this middle-aged mom who is learning to adapt and navigate what it means to be a mom of adult children that began some 23 years ago.

In all reality, I have never felt more peace and calm about my kids and their families. 

On this side of eternity, (like a roller coaster) there will always be the ups and downs...

that's normal, that's ok.  

 My heart swells with joy in the happy, but it also feels the pain with the struggles,

that never changes, it starts when they are littles still under our care.

 

                                   THIS ^ ^ ^

Prayer is my lifeline to God-

My kids and grands are covered in prayer every morning and occasionally thoughout the day.

They are such blessings and Im so grateful for them. 

Yah, for me it’s a coin flip! ❤️

Life is not perfect, but in my mind my kids are! I especially love the relationship that they have with each other, they are best friends, they communicate often and have each other‘s backs, 

THAT is more than I ever hoped and wished for my kids!  

Rick and I won’t always be here and I want for them to have each other more than anything. 

I often ask my kids to text me when they get to a destination, that involves some traveling. 

Sometimes they do, sometimes they don’t. 

I figure If I don’t hear from them no news is this good news, right?

Seriously though… 

I don’t expect them to answer me right away, but when they don’t, I can’t help but 

wonder are they in a ditch Somewhere [eye roll]

 

“ Once a mom, always a mom”

Here's mine...

Oldest..."about to leave"

Middle..."That's fantastic"

Youngest..."Headin on over unless y'all are gone.

I'd love to hear your responses. remember if you reply anonymously include your name! 

 

Mothers Day...

 This is my mom, I'm so glad she's mine. 

Today I took her to a clinic appointment then, just her and I went out for a meal at....can you guess?

"Pannekoeken" have you been to this restaurant?

The waitress runs out from the kitchen singing, "Pannekoeken" as she quickly set this

 yummy pancake-like meal in front of you, mom had Apple in hers.

I'm blessed to be the mom of 3 great kids, they bring me much joy, and make me proud to be their mom

Gavin, Brianna and Brice

Mothers Day for me involved church, then lunch with Rick. 

We then had the Rochester kids/grands stop by for a visit, we ordered out pizza for dinner. My oldest called mid-day from the Twin Cities to wish me a Happy Mothers Day.

My Mother's Day gift from Rick, a new battery powered trimmer and blower.

 No more having to drag an extension cord all around the yard.

Flowers from Gavin, I love the color he picked

My daughter.... such a good mom to these two.

She is truly amazing in so many ways.

My DIL, is a great mamma as well...lucky kids 

from my daughter and family, love this hanging plant for my deck

Our little artist Audrey, drawing....always creating.

I thought of 5 friend/family members that lost their mom's this year.

 I prayed for their hearts as I know there is deep sorrow in missing their mom's

I'm grateful to still have my mom...so thankful

Aren't Moms the best...

 I'm glad this ones mine!....

Thanks for putting up with me all these years, I'm glad I still have you to call when I wanna talk or ask about which ingredients go in a recipe, to walk around and look at your flowers, you are the best mom for me that's for sure.

Me and my Mom

There are several other ladies in my life that ARE mom's that mean the world to me....

Rick and his momma

What can I say, she's been my 2nd mom for 38 years and I miss her!

 During this "COVID Mother's day" she will not be visited by any of her kids as she is in
a Nursing home. I miss her, we all miss her. 

I hope she knows how much she is loved by her family!

My Daughter-in-love, Jenny

I love this one like she's my own, she is a sweet, patient mamma with 2 adorable littles.

I know God chose her for my son Brice!

My grandbabies are lucky to have a mom like you Jenny,

Love you!

This  one is my heart, walking outside my body...

The one who made me a mom first. You have taught me much sweet Brianna and I am so proud of you. I thank God he chose you for my grandbabies, they are blessed to have you for their mamma.

I'm blessed by these 3, they call me Mamma, Mum and Mom! 

I am so proud of them and they bring me great joy!

My Blessings! 

Mother's Day thoughts...

Happy Mother's Day to my Mom

I'm glad you're mine  

<3 br="">

We need to update our photo, but I kind of like this one from a few years ago.

I've got your spunk and attitude....lucky me  :)

My Loves...

those who call me "mom"

 I have never been more proud!

Being a mom NEVER goes away, It's hard-wired into our hearts.

Even though you are grown and on your own, I still want to be part of your lives, I always will.

You have all done a great job of nurturing your mamma's heart!

Brianna (and Chris) the way you trust us with Carson, 

and let us be with him even though diabetes can be tricky!

I'm sure that's hard for you, but you are always a text away when I'm needing reassurance. 

Thank you for sharing your littles with us and keeping us up to date on their activities!

Brice (and Jenny) You keep us up to date with the going-on's at your home by sending frequent photo's and video's of the babies. The video chats are the best, we need more of that. 

We love the sleepovers with Scarlett, I'm sure Lew will be joining soon....I hope  :) 

Gavin, I love how you just pop-in to see us, and make time to meet us for dinner a couple times a month. You get the title of "my baby",  just so you know that will never change. 

Someone got into my heart and wrote the quote below, 

(I think that is called plagiarizing), ha ha 

To my Children, Brianna, Brice & Gavin...

Because I am your mom...

These words are truth, I couldn't have said it better myself.

Did someone plagiarize me???

 Our baby left us a year ago this month.

Yep we have officially survived a solid year of being alone

Just he two of us   i.e empty nesters.

Our middle boy left us almost 7 years ago for this lovely lady

Our oldest left us almost 10 years ago for this handsome dude.

 Oh, dont feel sad for us,

(even though my mama heart yearns for all of them to be home with me so that I can take care of their every need, help them make decision that I feel are best for them,

wipe away their tears and buy their underwear).

I know , I know .... 

You did what you were suppose to do, you raised them the best you knew how,

 now they have to go and live their own life... yada yada yada

My 3 grown adult babies kids

My heart is split three ways and its walking around outside my body.
Once a mom....always a mom!

I'm gonna be honest here, those of you in the same boat can probably relate to the "empty nest"

The things nobody tells you
You are still gonna worry about those kids of yours
and then....
they go and have kids (your grandbabies) which sets off another whole set of worries.
It's not that we don't believe that our kids will be good parents,
after all they have us as role models, RIGHT????
 It's just that, well sometimes I think that those babies are mine, I'm not gonna lie about it.

So in summary, It's been a year, since the youngest jumped
 Rick and I are surviving the empty nest.
Our kids are wonderful adults, they are pretty great
 our grands even better.

Gavin is a wonderful young man.... still single.
Brie, Chris, Brice and Jenny are great parents, they share their babies with us
 and we feel loved even though they don't live with us anymore.

It's all good... sometime us mom's just gotta say what's on her heart!

Visit's, hugs and conversation...

 It's not only about the flowers from my daughter 

But they are about the prettiest I've ever seen

 Me and my sweet girl.

I love watching my daughter as a mom. 

Her love for those little one is so strong.

 She is the most patient, kind, loving, generous, God-loving and selfless mamma I know!

She is a wonderful example to her children... they have an amazing teacher.
 Did I mention silly?

It's not about the "selfie stick" I received from my youngest,
 It's about the photo...

  I actually love this photo of my son and I!

 I love every gift I received from my family. 

but I get the most joy from the visits and hugs and conversations!

My kids, grands and husband gifted me with love through communication and physical "presents"

About 8:30 pm on Mother's Day I became giddy with delight
when I saw my Daughter-in-love's name on my phone screen,

 I knew that meant "Facetime" with my 3 from the twin cities.

I opened my phone to the sweet face of my youngest granddaughter and her
words of excitement when she saw my face,... "nah-ma" (grandma).

~BE STILL MY HEART~

Even though they weren't in my presence physically, it meant a lot to talk with them on a live stream!

 I got to  spend time with my sister and mom on Mother's day weekend,

 We weeded mom's front flower bed...almost done, then we'll plant  :)

Mom's a good supervisor!

We were also blessed with the 2 other grands for an overnight at Grandma's house.

 Sweet girl, who's growing up fast.

I LOVE the look on Carson's face as he hauls all of uncle Gavin's discs back to the bag. 

Gavin seems quite enamored with his little nephew!

LOVE is a verb...

My kids and husband acted out love throughout the day with hugs, visits, and conversation.... 

they made time for me and I love them for that.

I'm one blessed mamma

BLOG HOP "Being a mom is tough "

My first "blog hop" I found this on
 http://proverbs31.org/online-bible-studies/current-study/  So here it is, my take on
"Being a mom is tough"

I always knew I wanted to be a mom.... 

We were married young, Rick 23 and me 21.

 We were eager to be parents,

 but decided to wait a year before we thought about starting a family.

 One year and nine months later we had our first....Brianna

 The boys followed, Brice 3 years after Brianna, then Gavin 4.5 years after Brice.

Being a mommy is so rewarding but also very challenging in many ways.

The rewards far outweigh the challenges, but who knew how hard it would be...

and still is, even with adult children.

I've always said kids act out throughout all their years of growing up, 

it's just different at each stage of life. 

Beginning with the terrible two's (for us it was the terrible three's) the tantrums,

 to pre-teens whining about what ALL their friends have but they don't get to have,

"everyone else's parents let them do it", have you heard that one yet young mom's? 

to teenagers, testing their boundaries, 

to young adult and their decisions that you have to let them make....ugh!

Then this is where it gets hard....

They leave you one by one

Then you begin to wonder... Did I mess them up?

Will they make the right decisions

Will they keep God first in their lives, and let Him direct their steps?

Was I a good example, was I patient enough, and did I show enough love?

My three in the middle,

Brice married Jennifer, 

Brianna married Chris.... Gavin, still single  :)

No matter how far away they are you miss them, and you worry!

Once a mom...always a mom, 

you cant help but want to know what they are doing, 

where they are going, and are they happy?

When it's all said and done,
I did what I thought best at that time,

at that moment, under those circumstances....

and I prayed a lot. 

My Greatest blessings

I love the song below, "Blessings" it's really about life and it's blessings.... 

 click the "play" button, the lyrics are included.... check it out

"what if your blessings come through raindrops, What if your healing comes through tears? What if a thousand sleepless nights is what it takes to know your near? 

What if the trials of this life are your mercies in disguise"....

For my Children...my blessings.

When despair finds you...

When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the Rock that is higher than I psalm 61:2

When you're weary...and you will be

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me Phil 4:13 

When you feel weak and worn out...

My grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in your weakness 2 Cor 12:9

Just when  you think you have it all figured out...

To everything there is a season and 

a time to every purpose under heaven  eccl 3:1

When you need reminding that you are His and he takes care of His own...

For I am the Lord, your God 

Who takes hold of your right hand and says to you,

Do not fear: I will help you  Isaiah 41:13

I prayed for you before you were conceived and have never stopped

you are my blessings, I love you Brianna, Brice and Gavin.

~Mom

A Mother's Blessings & Joy

A mother thinks about her children day and night. 

Even if they are not with her, and will love them in a way they will never understand.

Jennifer, Brice, Gavin, Brianna & Chris

3 of these I've had the privilege to raise... the one's that call me Mom.  

2 of them I adoringly claim as my own...

and all 5... I consider my Blessings & Joy!

You all make this mom proud of the young adults you have become.  

I Love you all.... "the mom"

~ ~ ~ ~

Happy Mother's Day to the best mom ever!

Dont forget to save the date for our annual mom & daughter road trip

Where to this year mom...you pick  :)

Trick or treat

 Oh those were the days....

Halloween 1991

Brianna 6,  Gavin 7 mo.  Brice 5

We loved dressing the kids up for trick or treating

I miss those days, it was wild around here, crazy with anticipation 

We had so many little ones in our cul-de-sac...

It was one big party

I dont have any little ones around anymore but the our youngest is still living with us,

 he's not little anymore 

but he's here, 

so I cherish every year I can still get him to carve a pumpkin.....

...and pose for me  :)

Thanks Gavin 

You make your mama happy!

 Gavin 20